For Angela: Should I Try Love Again?

Angela asked: i have a question for your tarot cards. I've just met someone i like a lot, but i've been hurt so many times and i don't want to be hurt again. Can you pleas ask your tarot cards what they have to say about us? Should i give him a chance?

Hooray! I worked out today so I can blog and I got brand new tarot cards (Legacy of the Divine - gorgeous!) for me to play with, so your question is timely.

Unsolicited advice (don't read if you don't want it): Before I do the reading, however, I'm going to butt in with one of my own thoughts. The reason that love can be so painful is because, in my opinion, it matters so much. If past failures cause you to close off your heart, those who have hurt you have done double damage. And, it should be noted, that there are many good people out there. When you "give someone a chance," remember that he or she has no responsibility for the actions of others - give him or her a real chance by looking at them with an open mind.

OK, on to the reading:

Past - Knight of Swords (reversed) - From your question, it will likely not surprise you that rupture relationships and quarrels are represented by this card in the reversed position. The gamut of reasons include selfishness, unreliability, immaturity, egoism, pushiness, obsessiveness... It speaks of strife with someone unreasonable or unhealthy for anyone wanting a lasting relationship.

Present - XIV Temperance - this card seems to argue you are in a state of healing and regeneration, that you are growing in self-acceptance with good influences and friendship. It's a very propitious card for beginning healthy relationships and finding a real comrades (which a long-term love should be).

Future - Wands X (reversed) - Wands X is a card about burdens and, in the reversed position, can show at least two paths for this question. One is that you have not let go your burdens, your pain, your damage from your previous relationships. Unless you can do so, even the healthiest relationship can be twisted and poisoned under the strain. But, there is also the possibility that someone in your future is again overbearing, pushy, oppressive. If that's the case, this is not a relationship that bodes well.

If you are indeed looking at another unhealthy relationship, it might be worth asking what attacts you to such individuals and if those things that attract you are actually symptoms of not-so-wonderful characteristics.

If, however, your baggage is the burden that stands in the way, you can only move forward when you've healed enough or you'll never be a healthy companion for someone else.

Good luck!

Update: Angela asked for another card, so I'm pulling one.

XVIII The Moon (reversed) - The moon is an interesting card, often as mysterious as it is helpful. It is also a very female card. In the reversed position, it talks about fear, misunderstandings, insecurities and misunderstandings. However, there is also the possibility of an era coming to a close and an uneasy peace after paying the price.

To me, this card reinforces my own impression. If you are not ready to regard someone without looking at him through a filter of past pain, his nature isn't the problem. He owes nothing for your past disappointments. Even the term "giving him a chance" seems to say you treat him with suspicion and mistrust - which is no way to start any relationship.

Maybe the question isn't should you give him a chance but can you give him a chance, which can only be done by looking at him on his own merits and not by comparing him to everything that's come before. According to the cards, you're at a place in your life where harmony and companionship are yours for the taking, but you have to be open enough to see them clearly.